Nope. We haven't seen Billy Blanks. Anywhere.

Does anyone remember Billy Blanks and his tae-bo kickboxing videos? I've done a few of them in my day. Worked up a sweat. Called it good.

See these red boxing gloves? We became aquainted tonight. And Billy Blanks? He was nowhere to be found.

Let me back up to share that I'm continually on a quest to find a Wednesday night workout. Hope is at Awana for two hours and I'm sick of hearing my fingers click on a keyboard at the library during that time. I've given water aerobics a try. It would be okay - if it weren't for all the water.

I located a drop-in kickboxing class just a few blocks from Awana. I coerced my friend Wendy into joining me. "It's kickboxing. You know, like Billy Blanks. Some aerobic moves, some punching and kicking the air. I think it will be good." I think I talked her into a half marathon with me in just about the same fashion.

We knew we were in trouble when the class started hauling in punching bags and hanging them from the ceiling. Followed by a classmate's question: "Did you guys bring boxing gloves?"

All we could do was laugh. Slide our hands into some pretty beat up (and unbelievable sweaty) class gloves. I had to turn off part of my brain to move forward - every germaphobic cell in my brain was firing off.

Ten minutes in, the acrobatic instructor sent us jogging around the mirrored room a few times. I knew I was toast.

Wendy and I made it about 40 minutes. Maybe 45. I can honestly say that I'm not sure I have EVER sweated so profusely. My sweat was sweating. No lie. And almost every part of my body felt like a squiggly mess.

Wendy and I howled when we got back in her car. Oh, to have video of the mess that we were. But you know what? We freaking did it. And you know what else? I'm going shock the shoes off of that instructor and go back next week. Hit the bag a little lighter. Kick a little slower. And jog when I can.

I'm also buying my own gloves. Having said that, I need to wash my hands again.

Freaking Billy Blanks. Yeesh. :)