Friday, October 12, 2007

My Mount Rushmore


It's a new day. A new blog. And a new view, this side of the Chicago Marathon. I may not have finished in an anticipated way, but I've gained some perspective, I pushed my body through some pretty unbelievable circumstances and I stuck with it. I'm researching some local half-marathons coming around in the spring that I hope to either walk...or run. I'm also toying with the Chicago Marathon next year. But we'll attack that one later in the season.


On my the flights to and from Chicago, I listened intently to a series by Pastor Chip Ingram called "From Good to Great." The topics are all over the map - dealing with thought life, heart, head, friends, etc. He challenged the listener (me) to look in the rear view mirror of my life and determine who has been the "Mt. Rushmore" of people who have invested/changed our lives. These people aren't necessarily spiritual mentors - but instead, folks who met me at a crossroad and changed the course of my life. So to speak. I've been wanting to jot this down since I deplaned on Wednesday...and now, here it is. Kris Baldyga's "Mt. Rushmore."


Pam Wilson. My Step-Mom. She was the first person who hopped to my mind. I can't imagine that this kind-hearted woman could have know she was inheriting upon marrying my Dad. If she had, I venture to guess she would have run. She was deposited into my life during some pretty raw years. She was the perfect blend of what I needed - and I know what I gave in return, wasn't always great. She was kind to me when I wasn't. She covered for me when I needed it. And she trusted me when I didn't deserve it. She passed along her addiction to soap operas (that I've since kicked!), a love for the era of late night mini-series (can anyone say "Thorn Birds?) and a longing for roast a mashed potatoes every time I return home. More than anything, she was just there. She loved me and was my friend - during a time when I didn't always know how to return the favor.


Loretta Rann. My lovely Loretta. She's known me for, um, 22 years. Unbelievable. She was the receptionist/executive mother of all things office at my first "real job" - Wilsey and Ham (that became W&H Pacific). An engineering firm on the eastside. I tend to make any older woman in my life my immediate mother, if they'll let me. It's a crazy trend that I've tried hard to break. Loretta was no exception. She took me under her wing. Worried about my sleep. My studies (I was in college). Did I have enough gas? Did I bring lunch? Had I seen a doctor lately? She fed me. Worried about me. Reminded me. And worked hard to set me up with the young engineers in the joint. I think she was more disappointed than I was that no budding romances took root. :) Loretta and I still keep in touch - although it's been years since we've seen one another. She is "good people" and invested herself into a much younger (and selfish) version of me. I'm not sure I would have made it through some of those younger years had it not been for my Loretta.


Janice Beck. Another office friend. She met me not long after some very rocky years in my young life. She was the first person to share the Lord with me. I wasn't hugely receptive - my catholic upbringing gave me some knowledge of who God was - but I had no application whatsoever. She was another lunch-bringing, love-giving, worrying-about-you presence in my life (do you see the pattern here?). Her family embraced me and I so needed the arms around me as I faced the world in a new and "very alone" time. We still "keep in touch" - me being the worse "keeper in toucher" of the two. She was Jesus to me before I knew what that meant.


Dottie. My mother-in-law. She loved me with abandon. And I couldn't often receive it - or didn't know how. My mother-in-law was a very simple woman with a simple faith that was contagious. She was infectious in the best possible way. In the early years, I longed to be with her, but didn't know how to love very healthily. She led me to the Lord. Bought me my first bible. Loved me when I was anything but loveable. In her last years, as she fought her second round of cancer, God did something very precious and amazing for the two of us. We became friends. And prayer-partners. She began staying weekends at our home. She and I became very close. We stayed up into the wee hours, pouring over the bible, sharing deep truths and holding our own prayer revivals in our little living room on Sergeant Street. She poured things into me that I still hold onto. And am praying like mad that they will come alive and come alive through the life of my little one. Thankfully, Lee is an awful lot like his Mom...so Hope has a chance! :) Dottie was my best friend. She's been gone 9-1/2 years and it still feels like yesterday. I miss her so severely. And she wasn't even my mom!


My husband. I simply have to include him. In so many ways, Lee raised me. Taught me how to survive. And at times, function. I entered his life a very insecure, uncertain girl who had a bucket of demons on her tail. I found a life with this man. We were not altogether stable on our own - but Lee was moreso than I was back then. He loved me. And worked through some crazy things with me. And gave me the gift of himself and his family. I just saw something written by Brian Andreas that reminds me of my man. "Tied together by stuff too difficult to explain to someone new." That is us. But I love my guy. I do, I do.


John Kinsella. My manager at SCS Engineers. Not a Christian, but a lovely man. For whatever reason, he believed in me. And helped unearth things in me that I didn't know existed. The ability to write. Market. Step outside of my comfort zone to sell and market. Learn how to read people. He came alongside me in a way that was so natural - and helped me excel in a job that began very small - but ended very big. He placed no boundaries on what was possible and would often say, "you're thinking small. expand." It was very hard to do, at first. But he a great manager- and invested himself in a way that still lives on. If Loretta is reading this, she'll chuckle at my mention of John. Loretta came to work at SCS a year or so after I did. What I call his "big thinking" could often be felt as random and lack of communication. And it was. But he was brilliant. And always sought the impossible. And did his best to invest some of that in me.


Shelly. My manager 10 years ago. And my manager again today. Our relationship ever evolves and she's become one of my dearest friends. We've both grown and changed. She continues to open new worlds for me. The world of print. Other ways of thinking. A pension for soft rock, oldies and Yo-Yo Ma. We forged many roads together - some professional, some personal, and some devastating. Most recently, we shared the experience of the marathon together - and I think, we'll do another again. Whether she knows it or not, she's been a mentor to me on the professional path...and someone who has continually taken the time to invest herself in me. My life would be much different had it not been for her.


Vicky Knapp. Wife of Pastor Don. Answering the cries of a very lost wife, mother and friend. She brought the Word of God to life for me. She helped me learn how to persevere - and not give up. She focused my view on others instead of the somewhat narcissitic way I was looking at my life. She gave me the tools to walk with Christ and let suffering mature me and help me grow instead of send me spiraling into a pit of despair. I love this woman desperately. She has been the most precious gift.


Employment at Calvary. I don't think I can put a face on this one. But I do have to include this time frame in my Mt. Rushmore. I don't attend this church anylonger - and my time as an employee there was likely the single-most difficult period of my life. But almost two-years later, I know God did much in me. Things I'm not certain He could have accomplished anywhere else. I still bear some scars from my time there--and I fear that I may have left some scars behind within the confines of that office. What I did emerge with is a new outlook. Properly placed expectations. And the new ability to lay boundaries both emotionally and professionally that evaded me previously. I continue to work on that one. It's just part of my journey.


If you don't see your name here...please don't take it personally. I tried to look back at pivotal junctures and what things formed me. Who was part of the molding and chipping away in my Mt. Rushmore.


What does your Mt. Rushmore look like? Doesn't have to be limited to the four figure heads you see above. It can be any number. And it may not even be a person. Think about it. Sometimes a look back is very healthy. And a great reminder from whence we have come.


Stay tuned....my treadmill time brought Part II of Chip's message--a look forward through the windshield.


Be well. Be blessed! Above all, be thankful. :)
k

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"The miracle isn't that I finished. The miracle is that I had the courage to start." -John Bingham, running speaker and writer